yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
