I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
