Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize