I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
