Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
