he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
