shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
