Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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