i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Randomize