i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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