Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
