Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
