He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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