I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
