It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
