It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
