sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
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