Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
