you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
