I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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