Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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