we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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