My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
