just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I need to stop coming to work sober
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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