Texts From Last Night

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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune

  (1-318): View more from Louisiana

  what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??

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  (318): dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune (1-318): what drug did you take to come to that conclusion?? http://tfl.nu/bym5
  Replies (80) Good night (4410) Bad night (849)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?

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  (214): Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college? http://tfl.nu/yctk
  Replies (3) Good night (776) Bad night (2407)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  he just said he'd buy the porn

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  its a step up from the last guy

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  (919): he just said he'd buy the porn (919): its a step up from the last guy http://tfl.nu/xur4
  Replies (9) Good night (2517) Bad night (715)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.

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  (651): It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave. http://tfl.nu/tj8s
  Replies (87) Good night (667) Bad night (4467)
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  (516): View more from New York

  we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class

  (914): View more from New York

  isnt today saturday?

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  (516): we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class (914): isnt today saturday? http://tfl.nu/dclk
  Replies (28) Good night (1134) Bad night (6346)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?

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  (217): I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower? http://tfl.nu/o882
  Replies (15) Good night (1012) Bad night (4065)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.

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  (903): Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later. http://tfl.nu/bq2x
  Replies (14) Good night (7415) Bad night (1199)
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.

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  (971): Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin. http://tfl.nu/6hx6
  Replies (6) Good night (2310) Bad night (1779)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.

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  (815): So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday. http://tfl.nu/ln4p
  Replies (3) Good night (2028) Bad night (818)
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  (909): View more from California

  Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.

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  (909): Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge. http://tfl.nu/2a01
  Replies (5) Good night (1867) Bad night (718)
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  (+82): View more from South Korea

  I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?

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  (+82): I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already? http://tfl.nu/a77n
  Replies (8) Good night (1786) Bad night (1161)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang

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  (610): Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang http://tfl.nu/jrxr
  Replies (2) Good night (1122) Bad night (584)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.

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  (+44): Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process. http://tfl.nu/j8pd
  Replies (1) Good night (698) Bad night (354)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right

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  (605): Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right http://tfl.nu/8f50
  Replies (11) Good night (1332) Bad night (522)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus

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  (727): I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus http://tfl.nu/mpo6
  Replies (2) Good night (1092) Bad night (367)

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