No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize
