Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
