Define "chronic" masturbator.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
