is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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