I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
