So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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