If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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