WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Vodka?
Forever.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Shame - the story of my life.
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