PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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