that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
