i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
