remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I fill condoms, not promises.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize