We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
