So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Randomize
