# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
