y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
