sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
