omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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