You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
