The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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