It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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