I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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