Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Randomize
