Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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