I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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