we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
